The bad dad

...let's see if you agree,

Heavenly sayings: Things you won't hear in Heaven:

"Holy Cow!"
"Boy, am I embarrassed."
"Did you bring the camera?"
"Why'd you forget the camera!"
"May I have your autograph?"
"I don't feel too good."
any vulgarity
blaspemy such as, "Oh gawd, -OR- Omigod", etc
"I'm broke."
"Where's the ATM?"
Global warming
Global cooling
ice age
Democrats
any adjective attached to the above
Republicans
any adjective attached to the above
Darwin's theory of evolution, which yields...
extinction, which yields...
"I'll be a monkeys uncle!"
too our lord, "Can you show me another trick?"
"Boy, I sure could use a smoke."
"Boy, I sure could use a drink." - in reference to alcohol since there will be a fountain from the throne we won't be thirsty
"The dog ate it."
"You're fired!"
"I quit!"
"Praise Allah!"
"Hari krishna"
Just some thoughts. Have a nice day. (I bet you won't hear that last there, either)